I wrote a post about my accident and wanted to share it here as well. You can find the original post on the Yoga Six website.
The thing about trauma is that in a matter of seconds your entire life as you had once known it changes, and there is no possible way to prepare for it. You don’t see it coming and you have no way of avoiding what is yet to come. You just have to go with it. You can either stay a victim or become a survivor. That was the choice I was faced with on the day of my accident and every following day.
I never thought my routine walk to work would change my life forever. It was only about a ten minute walk from my downtown Columbus apartment to the office, but that morning in September, I didn’t make it past my block – that morning I was hit by a city bus. I was run over and pulled underneath it while it continued with its route not realizing it was dragging me along with it. When the bus finally stopped, I was laying face down underneath, screaming for help. People started to gather around the bus to calm me down and let me know the paramedics were on their way. I was trying my hardest to ignore the unbearable pain and just focus on my breathing.
The paramedics arrived, got me out from under the bus, put me on a stretcher and rushed me to the ER. After running multiple scans and tests, they told me I’d be going into surgery in a couple of hours. I was terrified and had no idea what was going on or what was wrong.
I was in ICU for a few days and then moved to the trauma floor. I had multiple injuries and surgeries that left me with screws and plates in my lower back and pelvis. For the majority of my time at the hospital I could barely move or do anything on my own. I was only able to lay on my back. Getting out of bed was not an option–I couldn’t even sit up without the help of my nurses. I could barely sleep because I was always uncomfortable. I knew I was so incredibly lucky to be alive, but I would still cry multiple times a day because I was in immense pain even with the medications I was given. On top of the physical pain, I was emotionally drained. The depression, anxiety and post-traumatic stress were taking a toll on me.
From ICU to Recovery
After the most difficult two weeks of my life, I prepared to be relocated to an outpatient rehabilitation hospital. I was completely non-weight bearing on both of my legs, which meant I would be in a wheelchair for an undetermined amount of time. There was a lot of uncertainty and I wasn’t sure when I would be able to walk again.
I am beyond grateful for the amazing amount of support I had from family and friends. My close friends were at the hospital immediately after the accident and stayed there until I came out of surgery. I was constantly flowered with love and visits while I was in the hospital. I will forever cherish those people who lifted me up during my lowest points in life and continue to carry me through.
My parents and sister came in from Chicago and Los Angeles and never left my side for the few weeks following. My dad and sister became my biggest advocates when I was too weak to speak up. My mom ended up staying by my side for over three months. She slept almost every night with me in my hospital room and then on my couch in my apartment when I was discharged from the rehab. In the beginning I could do very little on my own. At age 23, I needed my mother’s help with my daily tasks including anything from helping me put my shoes on, to taking care of my dog. I’ve always been a pretty independent person, so accepting the fact that I needed the help of others was somewhat of a challenge.
I will forever appreciate all that my mom did for me during this time of my life. She truly is an amazing woman and mother. It was the most time we have spent together since I graduated high school and I wouldn’t trade that time for the world. In November I was cleared to use a walker along with my wheelchair. From there I started in-home therapy to slowly gain the strength to walk again. By mid-December I was cleared to start walking and was able to celebrate my 24th birthday on two feet.
Moving Forward
I’m ready to leave 2017 in the past and move forward with a life of health and happiness. In the beginning, I had a hard time accepting that my body had changed. I didn’t look like I use to. I lost over 20 pounds, my clothes no longer fit the same and I had new scars tattooed on my body. All of this has taught me the importance of loving yourself and being secure with what you have. My body is miraculous and my scars are my story of strength. I’ve gained a new perspective and deeper appreciation of my beautiful life.
I’m looking forward to starting outpatient rehab in January and eventually getting back to yoga classes. I will definitely have to incorporate new modifications into my practice. Blocks will become my new best friend, but I’m happy to have yoga in my life again to help with the physical and mental healing.
I struggled to find a way to write this post. Partially because I have trouble wrapping my head around what happened, but also because I’m still recovering. As I continue to heal, I look forward to eventually sharing my story in full. My goal is to connect with anyone who can relate in some way. Whether you’ve gone through your own similar experience or been there for a loved who has gone through it.
Neeloo, you have an amazing spirit. I am a former nurse so I have a tiny glimpse of what you went through, and I admire you. Your strength of spirit is beautiful. God bless you as you continue to heal.
Thank you so much for your kind words! My nurses were all so amazing and it made me truly appreciate what they do – it is not an easy job! I am sure you made the same impact on many of your own patients.
I am sorry for what happened to you. It’s good that you had family and friends by your side. Your story needs to be shared to people going through the same situation you went through.
Aw thank you! It means so so much to hear this from you. I really do hope to connect with others who may have gone through something similar. 🙂
Your story of recovery from such a horrific accident is inspiring! You look wonderful & I’m amazed you look so great after what happened; I’m assuming you are pain free? I’m just 5 mos post op from lumbar spinal fusion so I will hope to recover as well as you. I had done yoga for 15 yrs & thought I had to give it up.
After just one year your recovery is just astounding!
Aw your words mean so much to me! Thank you for taking the time to read my story and reach out. Unfortunately, I am not pain free 🙁 I have pretty consistent lower back pain throughout the day, but it is a lot better than what it used to be. With time I hope I eventually am pain free physically! Warm water physical therapy has helped me SO MUCH. I’ve also done dry needling, cupping and pretty much anything else to avoid taking pain killers. LOL. I hope you have a great recovery! I know I was very lucky with mine, but I just made sure to focus on doing my PT and eating well, keeping a positive mindset, etc. Yoga has been a nice gentle way to stretch and move, while also relaxing my mind. Thanks again!
Girl you’re amazing. PTSD from trauma and even hospital admissions are so real and it’s something that everyone is afraid to talk about. The stigma is that people should feel grateful to be alive, not scarred, confused, or like they’re missing something from their former life when they come home from an accident or big hospital stay. I can’t begin to imagine what that was like for you. You are so strong (sorry if you’re sick of hearing that) and brave for opening up about everything like this. I’m going to reach out to some coworkers and see if there are any trauma survivor groups based online that I can put you in touch with. Keep doing you, girl!
LISA! HI! Thank you so so much for reaching out! I could not say it better myself. I am sure with nursing and your background/experience you know all about that and see it in patients, etc.. But so refreshing to hear that and to know others deal with it too. I would LOVE to connect with anyone who may have dealt with similar situations. Thanks again! You are the best!
Wow, thank you so much for being brave and sharing our story. I couldn’t imagine what you have been through, you are strong and brave.
Thank you so much! That is very kind of you <3
Hi, very good article thanks for sharing.
You are excellent blogger
Thank you so much! I appreciate that!
Thank you for sharing your incredible story. It’s amazing you survived but you recovered so much! I have medical background in heart/lung. I must say your progress is inspiring.
Thank you so much for reading and your kind words!